#16: The Loyal Order of Corn

Episode 1017:  "The Loyal Order of Corn"

Watch on Hulu

Original Airdate:  March 22, 1992

One-Sentence Synopsis:  Eerie's fraternal organization, the Loyal Order of Corn, has recently inducted Marshall's father to help them with a secret project, and it appears the lodge's elderly bartender has all the answers about the true nature of the device, as well as the grey-haired kid's past.

Summary:

Marshall and Simon follow Marshall's dad to the Loyal Order of Corn, an organization that consist of most of the town's men that is seemingly centered around corn.  On that same night, the grey-haired kid has been hired as an assistant to the lodge's bartender.  When the men go in the mysterious back room to see if Marshall's father is "ready," the weird kid catches Marshall and Simon snooping, but they pay him to keep them hidden behind the bar.  While there, they notice that the bartender appears in every photograph of the Loyal Order's leaders, dating back to 1915.

The men leave the back room, with Marshall's father seemingly having failed his test.  They leave to continue their business back at the Teller house, along with the bartender.  The boys investigate the lodge and the weird kid shows them that he can unlock a cabinet that features the same markings that are on the back of his hands ("+" and "-").  The kid decides to name himself "Dash X" based on these markings, and since they are the only things identifying him.

Dash grabs a glowing crystal out of the cabinet and then takes the boys to the back room, which featured a large television screen, projecting barren landscapes, as well as an odd pedestal with the same plus/minus markings.  The crystal fits into the pedestal and the television screen becomes malleable, causing Simon to pass through into a frozen, snow wasteland.  The picture remains fuzzy and Simon is unable to pass back through.  Suddenly, the bartender returns and starts explaining himself.

He tells the boys that the Loyal Order of Corn has been unknowingly building a teleportation device that can send people to other worlds.  The bartender is actually an extraterrestrial explorer who ended up on Earth by accident in 1908.  Since he had no means of getting back to his home planet himself, he constructed the Loyal Order to gather individuals who could help invent the necessary technology to construct another device.  Marshall's father is in charge of the universal remote, which would allow the device to function properly.  Because the device was incomplete, Simon will remain trapped on some other planet until the remote is fixed.

Marshall rushes home to get his father's remote.  Once it's finished, they return to the lodge to free Simon.  But before the bartender can return to his home planet, Dash hijacks the remote.  The bartender seemingly knows a lot about his past and even shares the same markings on his hands.  He wants to leave Earth and find his true home, but the bartender instructs him to stay, since he has work to do on this planet.  The bartender leaves and the device is shut down.

Evidence Locker Item:  One of the Corn Lodge hats (which were used to hypnotize the men into building great inventions), Tag #258

References:

The Loyal Order of Moose - Moose Lodges first appeared in 1888 as organizations for men to provide community service and recreational activities.

My Favorite Martian - The bartender is played by Ray Walston, who was famous for his character Uncle Martin the Martian in this 1960s sitcom, and once again he plays an alien.

Review:

"The answer to your questions is simpler than you think and stranger than you imagine."

Like "The Lost Hour," this is another mythology episode that brings up more questions than it does answers.  This time, however, the focus is on Dash X.  He spends the whole episode discovering new things, and has to come to terms with the fact that he is probably an alien.  But, unfortunately, we never resolve his storyline, so we are just left scratching our heads.

The Corn Lodge is a great locations and it's fun seeing all of our favorite Eerie men gathered to act goofy in their corn hats.  It's another nice piece of world building, and it suggests at more sinister implications behind the weirdness that is Eerie.  Is the bartender behind Eerie's weirdness, or was his arrival just a byproduct of it?  Either way, it would have been nice to see more of the men's activities to see what influence they have over the whole town.  However, with Dash's storyline taking center stage, I'll have to take what I can get.

The television/teleportation device always seemed a little too impossible for my tastes.  I don't exactly understand how it was supposed to work or why it had to function as a TV.  I also wondered what was going on on Simon's side of the whole ordeal.  He can clearly breathe, so I guess he's not on one of the planets in our solar system.  But was there also a device at his end?  He stays put and keeps staring straight ahead, but could he see and hear what was going on back on Earth?  Or did he just step out from nothingness?  I feel that could have been explained better.

Nonetheless, the interactions with Dash and the bartender are great, and it makes this one of the most important episodes of the series.  There are some funny moments with the Corn Order, but they get pushed aside for the Simon story.  This would have benefitted from an hour-long episode, much like "The Lost Hour," if only to provide more details and explain just what the heck is going on!

Random Observations:

- Sgt. Knight remains in his police uniform instead of the Corn Order uniform.  He also stands rigidly with the popcorn that everyone is passing around and eating.  He doesn't do anything else in this episode, but his lack of movement makes him all the more interesting.  An episode based around the Eerie Police would have been a welcome addition to the bunch.

- Why does the Bartender appear in all the photos since 1915 and then display them prominently?  You think he'd be more discrete about his supernatural nature.

- Syndi doesn't appear at all in this episode.  Yet, it's still good.

Conspiracy Theories:

- Dash X asks the bartender if he is his father, and the bartender tells him no.  He claims that he doesn't know why they have the markings on his hand or why the kid has grey-hair, for this is how it has always been.  I am beginning to suspect that, like the milkman in "The Lost Hour," the bartender is actually Future Dash X.  That answer is certainly simpler and stranger than what he would imagine.  So, does that mean that Dash will someday leave Earth, travel through time, and return to Earth to ensure that mankind fulfills its duties in the world of technology?  That would make him another course corrector, just like Milkman Marshall.

Grade:  Another good mythology episode that suffers from a severe lack of answers.  A-

#15: No Brain, No Pain

Episode 1016:  "No Brain, No Pain"

Watch on Hulu

Original Airdate:  March 15, 1992

One-Sentence Synopsis:  A crazy, incoherent homeless man is revealed to actually be a genius who invented a device that can scramble and swap people's minds.

Summary:
After leaving dinner at a Chinese restaurant featuring some prophetic fortune cookies, the Teller family encounters a crazed homeless man shouting nonsense.  The family leaves him be, but the boys stay behind and watch as a woman appears out of nowhere shouting at the man and shooting him with a laser gun.  The boys, along with the grey-haired kid, step in to save him, and the lady runs off, claiming that the man is a genius and has something she wants.

Marshall and Simon bring the man home can clean him up to try to figure out his story, while he tinkers away with some of his trash.  They leave him in the care of Syndi and go to raid his alley of junk, with the only clue being the name "Sharona" that the man keeps repeating.  Meanwhile, the grey-haired kid strikes a deal with the lady when he learns she is loaded with cash.  He leads her to the Teller residence and together they kidnap the man, leaving behind the strange helmet he built.

Marshall and Simon discover an 8-track tape of Get the Knack featuring the song "My Sharona."  They take the tape, along with another strange device that the man had built and return home.  Syndi tells them that the grey-haired kid came and got him.  Rather than go after him, Marshall and Simon finish building the device by attaching the helmet and placing the tape in the slot.  As Simon dons the helmet, he is imbued with the mind of the genius, Charles Furnell.

Apparently, minds can be transported into different bodies via the machine.  Eunice, Charles' wife, wanted to use the machine for political reasons, controlling the president.  In order to keep the secrets of the machine safe, Charles placed his mind onto the 8-track tape.  Together, Charles (in Simon's body) and Marshall rush to the Hitchcock Mill to place Charles's mind back in his body.  When they arrive there is a brief scuffle and everyone's minds get switched (save for the weird kid, who left once he was paid).

The kids end up in the adults' bodies and vice-versa, so when the weird kid returns (having had a change of heart) and picks up the laser gun, he starts to threaten Eunice (who is actually Marshall), but the real Eunice (in Marshall's body) slips up and he makes sure to shoot the right person.  Once everyone gets sorted, Charles leaves with his machine, assuring that no more harm shall come from Eunice.  In fact, she's been quite pleasant recently...

Evidence Locker Item: The Get the Knack 8-track cassette (which may have Eunice's mind on it), Tag #1016

References:
Big Trouble in Little China - The Dragon of the Black Pool restaurant that the Tellers eat at is the exact same restaurant featured in John Carpenter's 1986 martial arts comedy film.

Review:
"Donna's a fool and Todd's a liar and I'm leaving!"

I am struggling with my feelings on this episode.  There are parts I really like and parts I really dislike, resulting in a muddled blah feeling as a result.  It's probably best just to take it step by step.

A crazy homeless man is actually a genius mastermind? Perfect, exactly what I expect from Eerie.  He invented a device that can swap people's brains?  That's kind of farfetched, even for Eerie, so I'm a little wary.  The device is dependent on an 8-track of "My Sharona"? That is an inspired detail and allows me to swallow the absurd premise.  The genius has an ex-wife that dresses like the Terminator and carries a laser gun?  You've lost me completely.

The story is fine just as it is, and even having the ex-wife as an antagonist would serve the story well.  But her character is so melodramatic, out of place, and weirdly-futuristic that the whole episode just comes off as silly.  Both Eunice and Charles are completely over-the-top.  It works when Charles is in his idiot mode, but when he switches to genus, he becomes such a caricature.  It's kind of funny when Charles the genius is in Simon's body because it gives Justin Shenkarow (the actor who plays Simon) some fun material to work with.  But after that, it's just too much.

There is some focus on the "Todd and Donna" soap opera that Syndi watches, so maybe they are trying to make a parallel between the cheesy soap-opera and Eunice and Charles's story, but it doesn't really read.  If that's what they were going for, they should of either cranked it up to eleven and make it really obvious and silly or just dropped the bit entirely.

I'm also not a fan of the grey-haired kid's repeated moral lessons.  In three episodes now, he has "had a change of heart" pulling through right at the end.  It is getting kind of old, and this one was the most saccharine as we actually see him step outside, start counting his ill-gotten money, and then make a huge "Oh, I should really go back and help those guys" face.  At least in the first episodes, this change of heart happened off camera so it always seemed like he was running on his own agenda and it kept him mysterious.  At this point, he should just admit that he's Marshall's friend.  Fortunately, this will change in episodes to come.

So yeah, all in all, there are some great ideas floating in the ether, but they are bogged down by unnecessary silliness.

Random Observations:
- I watched this episode on Hulu and noticed that "My Sharona" is never actually played, but there is a close facsimile that plays over the credits.  Maybe the DVD version is different, but I thought the actual song played when I first saw this episode.  I'll have to check.

- Well, since the episode doesn't feature it, it'll have to be enjoyed here:

- Edgar's fortune is: "Your immediate future will be interrupted by a mysterious stranger." (Charles Furnell rams him with his cart.)

- Simon's fortune is: "You will see the world through the eyes of many." (Simon actually only sees through the eyes of Charles Furnell, but the whole brain-swapping scene is close enough.)

- Marshall's fortune is: "You will live to tell the tale." (See Conspiracy Theories)

- There is a weird political theme running throughout the episode, with cracks at liberals and talks of replacing Reagan's brain with Macgyver's (which doesn't even make sense because Macgyver is fictional).  It feels forced and I don't like it.

- Syndi thinks the grey-haired kid is Simon's cousin.

Conspiracy Theories:
- Marshall's fortune implies something big is going to happen between him and Eerie and it will have casualties.  Will he destroy Eerie before Eerie destroys him?  That's the story I want to see!

Grade:  A good episode becomes a goofy episode and never looks back.  C+

#14: Mr. Chaney

Episode 1015:  "Mr. Chaney"

Watch on Hulu

Original Airdate:  March 8, 1992

One-Sentence Synopsis:  When he is crowned the Eerie Harvest King, Marshall discovers the true relationship between the fabled Eerie Wolf, the farmer Mr. Chaney, and the disappearances of all the previous winners.

Summary:
It's time for the Harvest King festival in Eerie.  Every 13 years, a lucky man is picked out of a lottery to win the title of Harvest King.  On the night of a full moon, after he is treated like a emperor for a day, he must go out into the mountains with Mr. Chaney as his guide and await the appearance of the Eerie Wolf.  If he sees the wolf, then there will be a good harvest, good luck and low taxes for the next 13 years.  Oh, and all previous winners have moved to Spain and never returned, for some unrelated reason.  It doesn't seem suspicious at all.

The Harvest Committee (Mayor Chisel, Radford, and Chaney) are fully aware that the Harvest King never returns, so they use it to eliminate the most despised citizen of Eerie.  At the moment, it happens to be the kid with the grey hair, so they enter a ticket with his name in order to rig the lottery.  However, the snooping kid overhears this and replaces his name with Marshall Teller's.  The next day, Radford reads out the rigged ticket and Marshall is dubbed the Harvest King.

Despite not entering the raffle, Marshall enjoys his day as a king and Mr. Chaney arrives to take him out in the woods.  The generally cheerful Chaney becomes very grim and stern during the night and upon the rising of the full moon, he transforms into a werewolf.  The grey-haired kid, having researched the disappearances of previous Harvest Kings, shows up just as the werewolf attacks Marshall.  He knocks the wolfman out, but Marshall is still wounded.  They take the unconscious beast home and Simon keeps guard while Marshall and the weird kid go to confront Mayor Chisel.

Chisel blows them off, but Radford expresses concern, realizing that he has always turned a blind eye to the carnage.  Back at home, Chaney escapes into the night, but Radford agrees to help the boys hunt down the wolfman.  Armed with a single silver bullet, the group heads back into the woods.  Chaney attacks Marshall again, but Radford manages to shoot him in the foot, curing him.

As for Marshall, Radford tries to concoct a cure for his scratches, but his efforts are in vain.  Marshall still suffers from some side effects every full moon: huge mutton chops.

Evidence Locker Item:  The Harvest King Crown, Tag #324

References:
The Wolf Man - Mr. Chaney is named after the movie star Lon Chaney, Jr., famous for his appearances as the Wolf Man in various films, beginning with the 1941 classic.

The Lottery - The Harvest King festival, in which a modern townsperson is sacrificed according to ancient tradition, is based on the annual event in the 1948 Shirley Jackson short story.  Both bring about good harvest, but only Eerie's event promises lower taxes.

Twin Peaks - After bashing the werewolf over the head with a log, the grey-haired kid introduces himself with "Well, it ain't the Log Lady," referencing a minor character who carried a log around town and treated it as if it were her late husband.

The Howling - Joe Dante directed his own werewolf film in 1981.  It's playing on TV the night of the Harvest King celebration.

Review:
"You've seen those old wolf man flicks."

As you can tell, this episode is two familiar stories tied together: The Lottery and The Wolf Man.  And while the first story fits right at home with the Eerie theme, the werewolf portions of the story are just regular by-the-numbers scenes without any of that good old Eerie twist.  As soon as the first line is said, you know exactly that Mr. Chaney is a werewolf and you can pretty much writes the episode from there.  This is disappointing because the more interesting story has to do with the lottery and the cover up.  Literally any monster could have been inserted and the plot still would have worked.  Using a werewolf opened up the floor for a unique take on the genre.  But instead we got more of the same.

The first act is nearly perfect.  This episode and "Heart on a Chain" where two that I didn't see in the initial run of the series, so I came at them with a fresh perspective.  I didn't remember much of this episode since I had only seen it when I first bought the DVDs, so I found myself surprised at a lot of what was occurring.  The fact that the Mayor had some kind of issue with the grey-haired kid was very alarming, and rigging the system to kill him was quite a dark turn.  Also, Radford's heroism is great and it's fun to watch his internal struggle over the episode, as he slowly realizes the error of his ways.

But there is something weird about the werewolf plot point.  This is the first time that the powers-that-be-in-Eerie have been overtly aware of the weirdness.  Yes, Mayor Chisel ignores Marshall's claims, but he seems to understand that werewolves exist.  And Radford definitely knows that werewolves exist now.  Usually there is some out, something that allows the adults to continue believing everything is normal, even when they are behind it all.  But here, everyone is like, "Eerie is the most normal town on Earth.  And we have werewolves, of course."

Nonetheless, the episode does build on the mythology of the town.  In fact, if this episode had been combined with "Tornado Days," it would have been nearly perfect.  Then we'd have more focus on the human sacrifice to appease the powers of the universe, rather than a human sacrifice to a werewolf in order to get 13 years of good luck.  That doesn't even make sense.

Stephen Root is great as Mr. Chaney (at least during the first act) but then he comes really standoffish (and then a werewolf).  I would have liked to have seen his character remain consistent throughout the episode.  Similar to how the previous episode featured a non-threatening ghost, Root's werewolf could have been meek and stuttering just like he was.  It would have provided some sort of twist.  Otherwise, we're left with just a boring old werewolf story.

Random Observations:
- Although the entire werewolf section is cliched, I just love Simon dropping his guard with "I'm hungry" and then promptly devouring a nearby apple pie.

- The entire sequence of Radford making the chicken-blood-based werewolf cure like a milkshake redeems the episode for me.  It's so silly, but John Astin is totally committed to it, having fun with his witch's brew.  That's a great incongruous Eerie moment if ever there was one: the soda jerk placing an eye on the whipped cream like a cherry.

- According to the old papers, Mayor Chisel was elected 13 years ago.  But he was working at the bank earlier in the year, wasn't he?  Also, Eerie loved disco and prohibition in the past.

- What happens to the Tellers' new cow?  We hear it mooing in the background, but it never figures back into the plot.  Maybe Chaney ate it.

Conspiracy Theories:
- What has the weird kid done that has upset Mayor Chisel so much that he wants him dead?  Has his snooping around actually uncovered more dirty secrets behind the scenes of this "normal" town.  Marshall's gathered enough evidence to raise suspicion, so the fact that this new kid is a bigger threat to the Mayor leads me to believe he is going to uncover something huge.  Maybe the Mayor is an alien?  And that's why he wanted the spacecraft so much a few episodes ago.

Grade:  The run-of-the-mill werewolf plot prevents this otherwise clever and funny episode from achieving greatness.  B+

#13: The Hole in the Head Gang

Episode 1014:  "The Hole in the Head Gang" a.k.a. "The Gun and the Toaster"

Watch on Hulu

Original Airdate:  March 1, 1992

One-Sentence Synopsis:  The boys meet a strange kid residing in an haunted mill, and together they unleash the spirit of Eerie's literally worst bank robber, Grungy Bill.

Summary:

Continuing their weekly chronicles of Eerie's weirdness, Marshall and Simon have decided to check out their 51st haunted structure, the Hitchcock Mill.  As they explore the condemned building, an angry spirit throws furniture at them and forbids them from returning.  Marshall snaps a couple pictures of the ghost before running away, but none of them are sharp enough to tell what's going on.

The boys stop by the World O'Stuff where Mr. Radford is being arrested by the police.  Apparently he was an imposter named Fred Suggs who kept the real Mr. Radford (John Astin) tied up in the basement.  The new, genial Mr. Radford takes an instant liking to the boys and tells them the tale of Grungy Bill, the ghost of the Hitchcock Mill.  He is known as the worst bank robber in Eerie history, not because he was dangerous or ruthless, but because he was so inept that he bungled every robbery he attempted.  On his final attempt, he lost his gun, so his spirit is rumored to haunt the mill, forever searching for his gun.

The boys return to the mill to try and find Grungy Bill and they discover that their previous encounter with a spirit was actually an elaborate hoax set up by a weird homeless kid residing in the mill.  The odd, grey-haired kid is gruff and anti-social and tells the two to leave because he doesn't want anyone knowing he's there.  While trying to destroy their photographic evidence, he breaks a hole in the floor and discovers a rusty old gun.  The gun goes off, releasing the spirit of Grungy Bill.

Grungy Bill, now reunited with his gun, takes a physical form and gets Marshall to tie up Simon and the weird kid.  He then says that he is going to rob the Eerie Bank once and for all so that he can finally be remembered for something other than being a fool.  He takes a disguised Marshall to the bank, while Simon and the kid manage to escape their ropes.  The kid leaves Simon behind, despite Simon's protests that they have to save Marshall.

At the bank, Bill and Marshall get in line and hand a folded up robbery note to the bank teller.  Simon shows up looking for Marshall, and the weird kid also shows up to help.  He knocks Simon into a little girl's piggy bank, distracting everyone in the bank.  Marshall takes the note back before the teller can read it and the weird kid grabs Bill's gun, returning him to spirit form.  Bill leaves, but not before stealing a toaster that the bank was giving away as part of a free promotion, finally making him a successful bank robber.

Evidence Locker Item:  Probably the stolen haunted toaster.

Review:

"What's with the gray hair?" "I'm starting a trend, what's it to you?"

This is the first reformatted episode of the series.  Television series usually begin with a 13-episode run and if the ratings are sufficient, the network orders more.  Here, NBC ordered 6 more episodes, so you'll notice that they have a couple differences not found in the first 13 produced.  (If you're wondering why this is labeled as Episode #13, note that it's production number is actually 14.  There is one more episode of the original group that we'll get to later.)

Because the series now has some very significant changes, a lot of this episode is spent introducing us to the differences, leaving us little time for the main plot.  First, we get two brand new characters: the real Mr. Radford and the greay-haired kid (played by Jason Marsden, a.k.a. that guy from the '90s who was in all your favorite shows).  Both of these are great additions to the cast, as they help flesh out more of the mythology of the show.  John Astin as Mr. Radford is wonderful because he plays the role with such an innocent charm.  Reprising his iconic eccentric and weird behavior from The Addams Family where he played Gomez Addams, Astin recaptures the joy and energy of playing an odd character in a silly show.  You always get the idea that he knows more than he's saying, but he is willing to help the boys no matter what.  The boys needed a support system in the show, and he fulfills that sort of "wise mentor" figure.  The original Mr. Radford was too erratic, sometimes helpful and sometimes antagonistic.  Astin is just nice.

Then we have the grey-haired kid (who will be named in a later episode).  He is the show's anti-hero.  At times, he plays the villain, but he has a good heart and almost always comes through for Marshall and Simon, his only friends.  He has no memory of his past and is also able to see that Eerie is a weird place.  His role is sort of what I feel Janet's (from "The Lost Hour") would have been, allowing us to see Eerie from a different perspective.  He's such an interesting character, even without his mysterious past, because he is quick witted and intelligent, adding a comedic element that we haven't yet seen in the show.

Finally, I've noticed that the show as a whole has really increased the humor aspect of the series.  Simon has become more of a snarky straight man, the dialogue is richer with jokes, and even the "weirdness" is treated with comedy rather than scariness or drama.  Take Grungy Bill.  He could have easily been a threatening ghost, but instead they make him a bumbling fool, a legend who is a legend for all the wrong reasons.  And it works.  It's a refreshing twist on the villainous ghost story.

This episode has to lay a lot of ground work, so it is not the most focused script.  But in introduces us to the new style of Eerie and each new element succeeds, so for that, I enjoy it.

Random Observations:

- Why is this episode called "The Hole in the Head Gang"?  Grungy Bill didn't have a gang.  Is it referring to Marshall, Simon, and the weird kid?

- Mr. Radford's banter with the kids is so sweet. "One Black Cow and one ditto."  He was the real reason I wanted the World O'Stuff to be real.

- Foreverware is 50% off at the World O'Stuff.  And a Foreverware mother and daughter are seen at the bank (I think it's Mrs. Swanson).  They are planning on buying a Foreverware for her doll.  I remember them from the first time I saw this episode, but I didn't remember their explicit Foreverware dialogue.  It was probably cut in syndication.  I think that's better because then it's more of an Easter Egg for longtime fans.  It's nice that the show is calling back to its origins.

- For a homeless boy with absolutely no memory before the last three months, the grey-haired kid certainly drops a lot of pop-culture references into his speech.  I like "Teenage Mutant Ghostbusters," though.

- Fred Suggs (the old Mr. Radford) is now masquerading as the banker.  I'm sorry that the actor had to be dropped from the show, but at least his character got a happy ending of sorts.  Apparently the actor Archie Hahn is a Joe Dante favorite.  (Joe Dante also directed this episode, so the change in style isn't a complete network reworking.)

Conspiracy Theories:

- Mr. Radford remains purposefully ambiguous as to whether he is the real Mr. Radford.  And his behavior during the Grungy Bill story (playing with an EKG meter, dusting a skeleton hand, and restocking a skull) implies he may have a deeper relationship with ghosts than he is letting on.  Perhaps, he is a ghost?

- The weird kid taunts Marshall, suggesting that maybe he is his evil twin.  Sounds like a good theory to me.  They are polar opposites morally, yet they both yearn to discover the truth.

Grade:  Despite containing obligatory introductions and a shorter-than-average story, the episode remains fun and entertaining.  B+

#12: Tornado Days

Episode 1013:  "Tornado Days"

Watch on Hulu

Original Airdate:  March 1, 1992

One-Sentence Synopsis:  Marshall angers a destructive tornado named "Old Bob" by refusing to attend the town's annual picnic in its honor, leaving it to an eccentric meteorologist to tame the beast.

Summary:
It's the 87th Tornado Day in Eerie and the whole town has gathered in the town center to celebrate the arrival of "Old Bob," a tornado that appears every year.  Marshall refuses to attend the picnic, on the grounds that it is weird to celebrate a destructive force of nature.  Marshall's parents assure him that Old Bob is just a town legend, there are no tornados reported in the news, and that the celebration just a community event that will be fun.  Nonetheless, Marshall and Simon stay home while their family leaves.  Moments later, Old Bob shows up right on schedule and passes right over Marshall's house, opening the doors, messing up the living room, and leaving behind a strange, large, metal canister outside.  The boys investigate the contraption and a strangely dress man emerges from inside.

The man introduces himself as Howard Raymer and explains that he is a meteorologist who has made it his life's goal to follow Old Bob around the country.  Whenever he gets the chance, he rides Old Bob in his canister.  He has a theory that tornados and other weather storms are actually sentient beings and his proof is a recording of Old Bob's wind howls.  When the sound is manipulated, the howls sounds as if they are saying Howard's name.  He suspects that Old Bob may be angry at Marshall because the next recording says, "Marshall Teller."

At the picnic, everyone is in good spirits, save for Marshall's parents who were surprised that the tornado actually showed up.  Still, the Eerie citizens are used to the visit and continue their celebration with the announcement of a raffle contest to win a camper trailer.  Back home, Marshall fears that Old Bob will return to damage the city, looking for him, so Howard agrees to try and communicate with the storm.  They climb a tower that links to the speaker system throughout the city, used to signal emergencies.  Howard emits his own recording, which sounds like more wind howls.  The sound confuses the citizens as they take it as another warning.  Marshall believes it was meant to scare Old Bob away, but Howard reveals that he was actually taunting Old Bob to return.

Old Bob changes his course and starts heading back towards the city, more powerful than before.  Howard explains that he has a long history with Bob, going back to the time he killed all of his friends and coworkers.  He surmises that if he can ride in Old Bob one more time, he can steer it over Lake Erie where the water would cause Old Bob to break apart and be destroyed.  Unfortunately, Old Bob destroys Harold's riding canister before he can get to it.  The group heads to the picnic so that they can steal the camper trailer for Harold to use instead.  With everyone else bunkering inside the World O'Stuff, the group takes the trailer and Harold prepares to leave.  As Marshall rushes to return Harold's recording device to him, Old Bob picks up the trailer, with Marshall dangling outside.

He holds on to Harold as long as he can, but ultimately, Old Bob rips Marshall away.  Back at the picnic, Marshall's family discovers his jacket falling from the sky and they rush home to see if Marshall is okay.  They encounter Simon who tells them that he last saw Marshall going out into the storm, but before they resign to their loss, Marshall appears high up in their tree, shaken, but safe.  That night, the news reports a UFO that looks like a trailer heading towards Lake Erie.

Evidence Locker Item:  Not seen, but Marshall ends up with one of Harold Raymer's gloves.

Review:
"You mean to tell me a twister's mad because I missed a picnic?"

This is a very confusing episode.  As strange as the premise is, I'm willing to accept that in this universe, tornados are like wild animals with human intelligence.  It reminds me of the Pecos Bill story where he has to tame a tornado.  That's a story that's rooted in American folklore, so it's fine that Eerie has a spin on it.  And the Harold Raymer character is great, exactly the kind of person you would expect to be riding around in tornados.  But it's Old Bob's behavior and the other characters' perception of him that confuses me.

First, Marshall's father insists that Old Bob is just a myth, for a tornado couldn't possibly appear on a set date every year.  Yet, everyone else in Eerie knows for a fact that Old Bob does appear every year.  Surely, there must be official records of this.  Did Edgar just not bother to check?  Second, Simon tells a story about a man who didn't attend a picnic one year and so Old Bob picked him up and carried him away.  Even if this is just a legend surrounding the picnic to get everybody to come, why would Marshall not believe it?  He knows weird things happen, and if anything, that would be reason enough to go to the celebration.  Maybe he just feels that going to the picnic would mean he was officially an Eerie citizen and he was just not ready for that.

Then, Old Bob comes and his movements aren't consistent with what people are saying about him.  If he was out to get Marshall, why does he just blow through town once, like he does every year?  Why does Harold have to call him back?  It seems like Old Bob did his thing, and has moved on from Eerie. No one else was in danger, so why was Marshall acting like they were.

In order for this episode's flaws to really stand out, replace "tornado" with "large bear," since the characters all treat it like an animal anyway.  We have a town that has "Bear Day" and every year, Old Bob the bear ventures through town and people throw a picnic to celebrate, before he moves on.  This year, Marshall refuses to go to the picnic, Old Bob the bear still comes through and leaves, only this time, the bear tracker says that the bear is out to get Marshall.  They call the bear back into town where it causes a lot of damage, it attacks the bear tracker, who then rides off on it.  See?  That makes no sense!  There is one interpretation that does work, but it is briefly touched on in only one scene which is cut in the syndicated version.  (I'll discuss it in "Random Observations.")

I do like a lot of the elements of the story, especially the idea of the town rallying together for this celebration.  Harold is a great character (played by Matt Frewer, a.k.a. Max Headroom), and his contraptions are pretty cool.  The voice of Old Bob is delightfully spooky.  But there are too many moments where I have to pause and ask, "Wait, why is this happening, again?"

Random Observations:
- Um, what does Old Bob do the rest of the year?  Does he stick to the same path?  Does he disappear and reappear?  Wouldn't the entire country be aware of this constant tornado?

- Also, tornados aren't named.  Hurricanes and other tropical storms are.

- Syndi's Miss Tornado Day outfit makes me wish more people were aware of this show because it would make for a great Halloween costume.

- Speaking of Syndi, she is the subject of the scene that should have been the focus of this episode.  She's really gung-ho about Tornado Day, and it's clear she has fully accepted being an Eerie citizen.  But, as the town takes shelter in the World O'Stuff during Old Bob's second visit, Mr. Radford and Sgt. Knight consider the possibility that something must be done to stop Bob's rage.  They decide that Old Bob probably demands a virgin, debutante sacrifice, and they both turn to look at Syndi.  That would have been a radical direction for the episode to take.  Treating Old Bob like an ancient god would have been a much better approach.  It could have started like a fun neighborhood picnic, but then we realize that the town still operates on these outdated beliefs that require human sacrifices.  A couple of later episodes play with this theme, but it would have worked so well here.

- The "special effects" in this episode are pretty underwhelming.  All tornado shots are clearly just stock footage.  It really takes you out of the episode.

- Apparently, Old Bob had a hand in Amelia Earhart's disappearance (and sudden residence in Eerie).

- I do love the raffle ticket scene.  Simon's just so excited to win.

- The "Marshall's death" scene could have been expanded on as well, since it was the one time that his parents were aware that the town's weirdness nearly killed him.

Conspiracy Theories:

- Based on Radford and Knight's conversation, human sacrifices have taken place in Eerie, and have occurred within their lifetimes.  They probably still occur to this day.  Maybe Eerie is the meeting place for an ancient society of weirdness deities.

Grade:  The story has several issues and hints at topics that should have been explored more fully, but the characters and premise remain fun and funny, resulting in a mixed bag.  B

#11: Marshall's Theory of Believability

Episode 1012:  "Marshall's Theory of Believability"

Watch on Hulu

Original Airdate:  February 2, 1992

One-Sentence Synopsis:  A professor of the paranormal visits Eerie with his museum of oddities, but he destroys Marshall's faith in weirdness when it is discovered that the recent UFO he found was a hoax.

Summary:
A traveling museum of the supernatural has stopped in front of the World O'Stuff and it has drawn quite the crowd, with Marshall and Simon being the first in line.  The owner of the caravan is a man named Professor Nigel Zircon, who studies in the "parabelievable."  Marshall believes he finally has found a legitimate source who will be willing to believe his Eerie theory and begins idolizing the man.  The rest of the town, including Mayor Chisel and Edgar Teller are more skeptical of the odd exhibits showcased in the museum.  Zircon claims that he has come to Eerie because he believes an extraterrestrial space-craft is due to land there soon, which has Marshall very excited.

Since the pictures of UFOs always come out blurry, Marshall and Simon decide to show Zircon the most credible piece of evidence they have from their locker: a plaster cast of a Bigfoot footprint.  They meet with Zircon, and explain how all sorts of weird things happen in Eerie, but when they pull out the footprint, they find that it has broken during the transport from Marshall's house.  Zircon keeps their spirits up, but their meeting is cut short when Mayor Chisel arrives to force Zircon out of town, saying that he is illegally parking in front of the World O'Stuff.  Zircon insists that he must remain for the arrival of the spacecraft and Marshall suggests he park the museum at his house.

Zircon spends the night at the Teller residence, causing great tension with Edgar, who believes that Zircon is just a con artist filling his son's head with lies.  Meanwhile Zircon's assistant prepares the fake crash site of the UFO (because Zircon is a con artist), but he gets interrupted by the sudden arrival of Bigfoot.  He sends up a flare and Marshall and Simon spot a bright light crashing in the sky from their backyard.  They grab Zircon and their parents to go investigate the crash, but while Zircon instinctively heads to the fake crash site, Marshall heads to the crash he saw.  There, they find a spacecraft and it looks nothing like the fake one Zircon's assistant had made.

Pretty soon, the town is in a frenzy, believing UFOs to be real.  Zircon takes ownership of the craft, assuming it is the fake one and the mayor attempts to claim it for himself since it landed in his town.  Marshall's father insists that Zircon is still a fraud and Marshall sneaks into the museum looking for something to prove his father wrong.  Instead, he finds fake IDs and building materials for the fake UFOs, shattering his faith in Zircon.

After much negotiation, the mayor offers to buy the craft for $1 million, but before Zircon can take the money, Marshall reveals the plans for the con and Zircon is run out of town.  Marshall and Simon discuss whether or not to keep the fake spacecraft in their evidence locker, when Zircon and his assistant reappear to apologize to the boys.  His assistant reveals that the spacecraft they found wasn't the one he planted.  Suddenly, the craft lights up and floats back into space, reaffirming Marshall's beliefs.

Evidence Locker Item:  Simon snaps a photo that is just as blurry as all of the others in the locker, but this time they know for sure that it's real.  (They also had a Bigfoot print found in Mr. and Mrs. Walter Funk's backyard on March 8th, 1991, but it broke.)

Review:
"I don't believe it!"

When you're a kid, you believe a lot of things that eventually turn out to not be true.  What drew me to this show was because, even though I knew it was fictional, I also believed in the supernatural.  UFOs, Bigfoot, ghosts were all within the realm of possibility for me.  So, having an episode focused on faith is a natural fit for this show.  Bigfoot and Elvis appearances aside, this episode had only one element of the supernatural and that was saved for the very end when the spacecraft floats away.  Up until then, both Marshall and the viewer's faith was tested.

As a kid, I didn't really understand this episode.  I didn't understand why Zircon would be faking all of this weird stuff.  He was an adult, he would know the truth.  I, like Marshall, was very disappointed and confused.  Watching it now, I can tell from the start that he is just a swindler.  The character speaks believably and intelligently and doesn't act like a cliched con artist, but that's all a part of his ruse.  He has done this trick for so long that he can authentically convey belief in the supernatural.  Seeing Marshall get suckered in by it is sad, if only because it makes us realize how we've only seen Eerie through his eyes.

Since Marshall is our narrator for every episode, we take him at his word, and we think that Eerie is obviously weird.  But now we start to see things from his parents' perspective, and scientist Edgar is truly concerned about Marshall's hobbies.  While we see Marshall as the only observant citizen, Edgar sees a troubled mind.  The balance of normal vs. weird is thrown off by this episode, and that makes it an excellent story.

We start to believe that maybe nothing we have seen so far is actually true.  Maybe Marshall's imagination has just got the better of him.  If you look at Marshall's evidence locker, you'll notice that none of the items yield any actual proof of his journeys.  A bag of glasses?  A Tupperware container with an old sandwich?  A mangled retainer?  To the outside observer, it's just a bunch of junk.

This may not be the funniest or weirdest episode of Eerie, Indiana, but it is one of the most important.  He reminds us to value logic and not get distracted by the unbelievable.  The truth is out there.

Random Observations:
- Bigfoot has a cute little bow.  Why do get the feeling some old lady put that bow on its head, mistaking it for a puppy?

- Edgar Teller's credentials are impressive: intern at Smithsonian Institute, undergrad at Syracuse in archeology, NASA Scholarship to MIT, and his thesis, "Matter: What Is It Exactly?"

- Mayor Chisel's council includes Sgt. Knight, Mr. Radford as a redneck deputy sheriff, Elvis, a group of Japanese businessmen (part of the Eerie-Yoshizaki Consortium), and an elderly milkman (Marshall?)

- I want a "I Have Been to Eerie and Seen the Space Thing" t-shirt.

- After learning Santa Claus wasn't real, Marshall stayed up to wait for him and his camera broke before he could get a picture.  How long ago was this?  Does Marshall still believe in Santa?  Is he real in this universe?  Man, I wish Eerie had a Christmas episode.

Conspiracy Theories:
- Why did the spacecraft arrive the exact same night the fake one was launched?  And why did it leave so quickly?  Were there living creatures inside of it?  It spent 24 hours in Eerie.  Maybe it was preparing for an invasion.  Or maybe, it was dropping off a certain gray-haired visitor...

Grade:  A solid episode that's light on weirdness and humor, but heavy on philosophy.  B+

#10: The Lost Hour

Episode 1010:  "The Lost Hour"

Watch on Hulu

Original Airdate:  December 1, 1991

One-Sentence Synopsis:  It's Daylight Savings Time everywhere but Indiana, so when Marshall is the only person in Eerie to set his watch back an hour, he finds himself in an nearly-empty, alternate dimension, an hour behind everyone else.

Summary:
It's bedtime at the Teller residence and Marshall wants to stay up an extra hour with Simon (who is spending the night).  He insists that it's Daylight Savings Time, so he deserves an extra hour to stay up, but Marshall's father tells him that the state of Indiana doesn't observe DST because it's too difficult for the schedules of the farmers who populate the state.  As Marshall's parents clean up after the boys, they notice that the missing girl on the milk carton has been missing for a year now.  She has presumedly run away, and as his parents leave, Marshall mentions to Simon that he would like to run away so he could be free from his parents' rules.  In an act of defiance, he sets his watch back anyway, saying that he's going to get an extra hour even if Eerie doesn't.

Marshall awakes to find Simon missing and the house completely empty.  He ventures outside it seems as if the entire population has vanished.  He finally spots some garbagemen in dark uniforms and sunglasses throwing bags of garbage into their black truck.  He goes up to them asking for an explanation, but they don't respond and instead advance on him.  He runs away from them and nearly runs into an Eerie Dairy truck.  The old milkman ushers him on board to get him to safety.  Surprisingly, the milkman knows who Marshall is and where he lives.  He explains that when Marshall set his watch back, he caused a temporal shift and he fell between dimensions, into the Lost Hour.  The "garbagemen" are actually relativity police, fixing the Lost Hour so that nothing disrupts the flow of time.  They remove what shouldn't be there, a.k.a. Marshall.

Back in real time, Simon heads down to breakfast and everyone wonders where Marshall is.  Simon remembers Marshall talking about running away and he tries to cover for him, saying he's just out jogging.  In the Lost Hour, the milkman shows Marshall the window in the back of his truck, which shows "whatever needs to be there."  Marshall peers through, and his face appears on the "Missing" label on the milk carton on the Teller's breakfast table.  He shouts to Simon, startling him.  Marshall, now fully believing that he has been displaced from time, asks the milkman for help.  The milkman tells Marshall that he'll help him, but first he must also rescue Janet Donner, the missing girl who has been trapped there for a year.

Since Janet has become skilled at hiding from the garbagemen and the milkman, Marshall heads out alone in his father's car.  He accepts that he's probably never going to find her and should just head back to New Jersey, living a free life like he always wanted.  He heads to the World O'Stuff to stock up on supplies and gets captured by Janet, who has been using the store as a hide out.  Marshall tries to explain the whole situation to her, but Janet is just under the belief that everyone has abandoned her and refuses to accept what actually happened.  So instead, Marshall suggests she join him on his road trip to New Jersey.  She agrees, adding a few more destinations, but their trip gets cut short when the garbagemen spot them.  The milkman quickly arrives to save them and tells them that their hour-long window of opportunity is almost up.  Unless they correct their watches, they will be trapped in the Lost Hour for another year.

Janet refuses until she peers through the milk truck window and sees her family, mourning the one-year anniversary of her disappearance.  She finally understands that she needs to return and sets her watch back.  Unfortunately, Marshall left his watch back in the real world.  Racing against time, he appears in the milk carton again, and tells Simon to fix his watch.  Before Marshall leaves, he asks the milkman who he is, and the milkman just tells him that a long time from now, he (Marshall) will return to the Lost Hour.  He then shows Marshall a key hanging around his neck that is exactly like Marshall's Evidence Locker key.  Leaving the mind-blowing moment behind, Marshall races back to his bedroom just as Simon pulls him back into reality.

Evidence Locker Item:  The milk carton, with the "Missing" picture now empty (for Janet was successfully reunited with her family).

References:
Jimmy Hoffa - The famous labor union leader from the '60s and '70s whose crimes and ties with the mafia caused a national interest in his 1975 disappearance in Michigan.  Most suspect he was killed while others believe he had gone off the grid.  Janet mentions that she briefly met a "Mr. Hoffa" in the Lost Hour who was quickly captured by the garbagemen.  Guess we know where he went now.

Review:
"I want my hour!"

This is it.  The big mythology episode of Eerie, Indiana.  When The X-Files aired a few years later, the idea of a show having a mysterious mythology became very popular.  The show would have an overarching storyline that would be developed every couple of episodes while the rest were filler "monster of the week" stories.  The filler episodes were fun and entertaining, but it's the mythology that kept viewers coming back, searching for answers to their questions.

Being the first (and pretty much only) mythology episode of Eerie, Indiana, "The Lost Hour" sets up many more questions than it does answers, but it still manages to create a satisfying story on it's own.  Using the concept of Daylight Savings Time as the jumping off point for an alternate dimension story is very cool and very Eerie.  Although the rules are a little confusing, the episode attempts to explain what's going on without losing it's entertainment value.  On it's own, it would have been fine, but adding the elderly Marshall character makes the whole scenario ten times better.

This implies that there is a link between Eerie and Marshall, whether he likes it or not.  He will eventually become the protector of Eerie.  Why?  We'll probably never know.  But I truly believe that this explains the high number of milk truck related accidents that occur around Eerie.  It's weird that elderly Marshall may be potentially killing kids instead of saving them, but I see it as more of course correction.  Like the garbagemen, he has to ensure certain events occur so that the space-time continuum isn't destroyed.

We also get the subplot of Janet Donner, who has a whole story to tell.  Marshall ties it into his own life, figuring that for all of his talk for wishing his family away, this girl actually had to live it and become independent at the age of 12.  It's a startlingly real story in the middle of all the craziness, as evidenced by the tearful reunion at the end.  Leave it to Eerie to manage a story that is simultaneously funny, sad, whimsical, and metaphysical.

All in all, this episode is dense.  There is so much happening that his has to rush by.  And since the show was cancelled, we never got to return to the mysteries set up in this episode.  My wish is that this episode had actually been an hour long.  We would watch Marshall's adventure in real-time and each element of the story would be allowed to breather.  Marshall's confusion, his survival, his relationship with the milkman and Janet, and the race against time to undo what he did.  This would have added some more dramatic weight to the story, and we could have also seen more of what was going through Simon's mind back in the real world.  This episode just leaves you wanting more.  I wish I could set back my watch and get that extra hour.

Random Observations:
- This episode was directed by Bob Balaban who you may recognize from various Christopher Guest movies, among other projects.

- The garbage truck reads: "SPACE TIME MAINTENANCE TEAM" and "E=mc²" just in case you had any doubts.

- The Things Inc. coffee cake that the Tellers eat from breakfast is surprisingly chewy.  Perhaps they need some banana-flavored petrol to wash it down with.

- This should have been the last episode (out of the ones that aired).  Obviously, the series was cut short, but of the episode we have, this makes sense as the conclusion.  It doesn't really answer any questions, but it gives us an idea that there is a lot more to Eerie than we think we know and it would have left fans with something to ponder.  By being in the exact middle, we have all of these unanswered questions PLUS a whole half of the series to go, just teasing us.  There is one or two more episodes that sort of come close to hinting at the mythology, but none as big as this one.

- Since it was not the last episode, Janet should have become a recurring character.  She is not only someone who experienced Eerie's weirdness firsthand and lived to tell about it, she's also in the unique position of having been missing from Eerie for a whole year.  Her re-entry to society would be difficult and Marshall and Simon would have been very supportive.  Plus, in the brief time we know her, we get a sense that while she has achieved total independence now, she would have a lot of psychological trauma and issues stemming from her disappearance.

- But my main reason for keeping Janet would be this:

The love story in "Heart on a Chain" was wonderful, but even though Melanie witnessed Eerie's weirdness, she and Marshall were not exactly a good match.  Melanie's heart belonged to Devon, and she died to be with him.  Janet and Marshall, on the other hand, are perfect together.  The two of them have both been to the Lost Hour and survived.  During the episode, I barely saw them as a romantic item, but at the end, when Janet suddenly kisses Marshall, it completely changed how I viewed their relationship (in fact, despite having seen this episode many times before, I only caught the kiss just now).  They believed themselves to be the last two people on Earth and were going on an epic road trip together.  Of course a romance would form.  Marshall promises to see her again when they return to the real world and then he never does (at least, not from what we see).  Not to get to fanfic-y, but it's nice to imagine that the two of them remained close after the events of this episode.   So that's the main reason I choose to treat this as the final episode.

- I like that young Marshall finds it cool that the entire universe and fabric of time could be destroyed by his presence in the Lost Hour.

Conspiracy Theories:

- The garbagemen must do more than just destroy stuff.  Presumably they have to replace stuff and fix stuff as well.  With Janet living at the World O'Stuff, Radford probably noticed a lot of his stuff went missing the past year.

- Milkman Marshall doesn't live in the Lost Hour.  He's a time traveller.  This explains the appearance in 1929.  He's probably only been to the Lost Hour just this once, and he is doing everything based on memory from when he was young Marshall.  That's why he knows exactly where Marshall will be.  It's a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy at work.  He tells Marshall to save Janet because he remembers saving Janet.  We see a milk truck at the end of the episode and they make it a point to show that other people are around, implying that Milkman Marshall left the Lost Hour as well.

Grade:  A must-see, jam-packed episode filled with drama, comedy, Eerie mythology, and well-developed science-fiction that should have been twice as long.  A+